I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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