At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize