Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
