I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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