This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
