Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
