i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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