You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
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