I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
