he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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