Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
