Are we in a gay sports bar?
Nicole vs. Life
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
