so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
