Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
My feet surprised me
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
