I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
