We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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