If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
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