the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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