please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
only you would photoshop your dick
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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