New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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