Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
