the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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