while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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