i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
