It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
