That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
