drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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