But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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