New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
