Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
