i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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