You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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