I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
