As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
