Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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