I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
People in love make me want to vomit
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
