Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
