I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
