She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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