Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
he high fived his dick after we had sex
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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