First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
