I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
