I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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