I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
how drunk are you?
Several
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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