woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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