Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
