At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
