There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i barfeds in our rink
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
