My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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