i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
